There’s a Coach for Everything!

My friend, Glee, has a finance coach, a fitness coach, a book coach (yes, she’s writing a self-help book) and now a dating coach. I’m from a generation that remembers coaches as someone who blew a whistle during a physical education class and had sweaty armpits. Now middle-aged people, that’s 35-55, folks, who are single can hire Joann Cohen from Gilbert. AZ or they can take one of her Flirting 101 classes. Ms. Cohen is making an industry out of getting people together. My mother would call her a yenta, but this woman is smart! She starting her mixers all over the country and she’s developing an online dating service.

First people take the Flirting 101 class or they can attend one of her events. She has special ones to introduce woman of a certain age to younger men. Joann says they’re M.E.O.W. Mixers. People have a lot of judgment about cougars. I think you should be able to be with whomever you want to, but some people think the man should be older. By the way, we’re not supposed to use the word cougar anymore. Joann says it’s Men Enjoying Older Women.

Anyway, Glee met Rob at one of Joann’s mixers and she likes him. Although she’s self-conscious about him looking younger.

A Kiss Can Be Deadly

The smart, professorial types down in Tucson, especially the ones with a wry eye toward politics, say Chagas disease is carried by “kissing bugs”. This disease can kill tens of thousands of the inhabitants in Central and South America. People who sleep in mud huts or thatched houses are at high risk because they like body warmth and hot breath. Sounds like a few men I dated. Anyway, Carolina Reisenman, a University of Arizona research biologist, got people to collect the bugs so she could test their DNA. Forty percent carried Chagas.

Now you may not find this bizarre news interesting but for my mother it is another reason to be paranoid. “Jean, did you see the paper?”

Reading the newspaper is one of the mother-daughter bonds we have. We read the paper and then discuss  articles or the editorials. I knew immediately which article she meant because the paper’s thin and she doesn’t read the sports or business sections. She likes weather and crime a lot.

“Jean,I don’t have enough to stress about? Now there’s bugs that kiss us  and we die? ”

“Mom, don’t worry. You won’t get it and you won’t die.”

“Why not?”

“Because you live in Scottsdale. We don’t have any mud huts here.”

“I just as soon check out now and join your father. Before I have bunion surgery.”

Mayor Becomes Fashion Consultant

In Scottsdale, the most fashionable of cities, Mayor Jim Lane is asking Scottsdale residents to dress western on Wednesdays in February to celebrate the Parada del Sol, a parade, rodeo and festivities that have been happening for 57 years. April called to tell me she’s going to wear her designer jeans, a silk cowboy shirt and cowboy boots when she goes to the bank. She said, “If we all dress western,” which in my case means unfashionable jeans, a bandanna (which my mother hates–“Jean, women with style wear scarves.”) and Birkenstocks, “the tourists will think they’re in a real western town.” And so they are. We’ve just glitzed it up a bit.

One Response to “Dating Coaches, Kissing Bugs and Dress Western”

  1. Marleen Luitjens Says:

    Not certain how I got here but I feel like I was supposed to see this. Thanks.

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