Are You Happy?

3:14 pm

Elation and Your Health

Okay, Folks, I know this is a relative question and it can shift many times during the day, but are you happy? Really happy? Bubbling, excited jumping up-and-down exuberant, thrilled and happy? No? Maybe you’re content, cheerful, fulfilled and sitting there with a wistful smile on your face?

I ricochet around like a pool table ball all day long with my mother’s calls to complain about getting old (“Mom, I can’t do anything about that), whether her neighbor’s hemorrhoid cream will shrink the bags under her eyes (“I wouldn’t try that. If it gets in your eye you might be blind and I don’t have time to get you a patch and a cane, let alone a guide dog that wears a special jacket.” “A jacket? What color is it?”), Maury’s sincere assistance that makes everything I do harder (“I’m sorry I put the wrong address in your GPS and you were lost for two hours.”) or my adorable friends’ suggestions.

“Jean, I’m worried about you because you’re under so much stress. April and I are on this call because we care about you. A study by the National Institutes of Health says that the happier you are the less likely that you’ll develop heart problems. Twenty-two percent less!”

“Right. If you’re not going to take advantage of living in Scottsdale to shop or go to one of our exceptional spas–and keep in mind I’m happy to share my masseuse, Jerome, with you– then you you have to do the suggested exercises.”

“Glee, April, I appreciate your caring very much, but I’m getting stressed just listening to your suggestions. I don’t have time for exercises. I barely have time to close all the kitchen cabinets that Maury leaves open while he’s looking for snacks.”

“It’s so easy. Just take a piece of paper and write down what makes you happy across the top– like your dog, reading, watching “Glee”, Maury. Okay, well, maybe not Maury. Then list the ways you make each of them more enjoyable. Like under the dog category write down brushing for thirty minutes.”

“Ladies, you can’t be serious. First of all, I’m happy. Or relatively so. I wouldn’t say I’m delerious but I’m happy. Secondly, if I brush Amber for thirty minutes she’ll be bald and I’ll have a giant hairball in my living room that won’t allow us to breathe or see the TV. And, third, I don’t have time to think about whether I’m happy or not. I just live.”

“Well, that’s no way to function!” Click.

2 Responses to “Are You Happy?”

  1. molly campbell Says:

    I love Jean Rubin! She reminds me of a really gorgeous chick I know named Marcia, but of course, Marcia is not a writer, she is a super model. If I looked like my friend Marcia the model, I would be VERY happy! molly

  2. Jean Rubin Says:

    I think with your savvy smarts you’re happy all the time!

Leave a Reply